I know where it all started…

My love for polish that is.  I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately.

I’ve bitten my nails since I was a little kid.  My mom tried to tell me that they were too dirty, my great aunt told me that I would get worms,  and my grandmama said it was disgusting.  I would bite them till they bled.  It was gross.  In high school I started getting acrylics.  I would get them for months and then peel them off and paint my little nubs.  My mom used to say that if I spent as much time on my homework as I did on my nails I would be a straight A student.  Into my early adult life I couldn’t stop biting them.  I had a million polishes, glitter, creme, and shimmer, but my nails were always little nubs.  One of my childhood friends, Cassie, always bit her nails too, but at her wedding shower she told me how she finally overcame it and she was growing out her nails for her big day.  I got engaged and I thought I would do the same thing.  I would get strengtheners, repair serums, once I even got some oil that claimed it had actual diamond dust in it, but I still bit them.

My mom has beautiful nails.  She spends at least 2 nights a week giving herself a manicure.  She’s cried when she’s broken a nail.  My grandmama had the most amazing nails.  They were naturally as hard as acrylics.  She always painted them frost white.  They were so beautiful.  Even when she was dying of lung cancer the nurses would comment on her nails.  When she finally passed I inherited all of her frost white polish.  She had multiple bottles from different brands.  I’ve only painted my nails frost white once, on my wedding day, in memory of her.  I could never bring myself to paint my nubs frost white, it seemed like it tarnished her gorgeous nail’s glory.

My mother and grandmama are/were the strongest women I know, with strong nails to boot.  Sure, they have/had their problems, but they’re amazing women.  When I decided to be a strong woman, they day I left my ex, was the day that I decided to stop biting my nails and I haven’t since then.  I know it sounds silly, but I look at my nails as another obstacle I’ve overcome and I also look at them as another piece of myself that Im reclaiming.  I’m a new person, with a new life and a new set of nails.  Getting divorced has done a lot to me, but the best thing its done is help me become the strong woman that would make my grandmama and has made my mother proud.

You never thought nail polish could get deep, did you?

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2 Responses

  1. I’m so sorry to hear about your divorce, but I completely understand what you mean about not being able to stop biting your nails. I’m trying not to as well and I’m completely addicted to nail polish!

  2. Girl, I STILL struggle with biting my nails! I had some incredible motivation for the wedding, and when I was pregnant my nails were FANTASTIC! Currently: they are in a 1/2 way stage, I need to grow them out longer so I can make them as pretty as yours. You obviously got the family nails, because yours look great!

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