I know where it all started…

My love for polish that is.  I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately.

I’ve bitten my nails since I was a little kid.  My mom tried to tell me that they were too dirty, my great aunt told me that I would get worms,  and my grandmama said it was disgusting.  I would bite them till they bled.  It was gross.  In high school I started getting acrylics.  I would get them for months and then peel them off and paint my little nubs.  My mom used to say that if I spent as much time on my homework as I did on my nails I would be a straight A student.  Into my early adult life I couldn’t stop biting them.  I had a million polishes, glitter, creme, and shimmer, but my nails were always little nubs.  One of my childhood friends, Cassie, always bit her nails too, but at her wedding shower she told me how she finally overcame it and she was growing out her nails for her big day.  I got engaged and I thought I would do the same thing.  I would get strengtheners, repair serums, once I even got some oil that claimed it had actual diamond dust in it, but I still bit them.

My mom has beautiful nails.  She spends at least 2 nights a week giving herself a manicure.  She’s cried when she’s broken a nail.  My grandmama had the most amazing nails.  They were naturally as hard as acrylics.  She always painted them frost white.  They were so beautiful.  Even when she was dying of lung cancer the nurses would comment on her nails.  When she finally passed I inherited all of her frost white polish.  She had multiple bottles from different brands.  I’ve only painted my nails frost white once, on my wedding day, in memory of her.  I could never bring myself to paint my nubs frost white, it seemed like it tarnished her gorgeous nail’s glory.

My mother and grandmama are/were the strongest women I know, with strong nails to boot.  Sure, they have/had their problems, but they’re amazing women.  When I decided to be a strong woman, they day I left my ex, was the day that I decided to stop biting my nails and I haven’t since then.  I know it sounds silly, but I look at my nails as another obstacle I’ve overcome and I also look at them as another piece of myself that Im reclaiming.  I’m a new person, with a new life and a new set of nails.  Getting divorced has done a lot to me, but the best thing its done is help me become the strong woman that would make my grandmama and has made my mother proud.

You never thought nail polish could get deep, did you?

Part of my stash

Friday was my first visit to Forever 21.  I picked up 2 polishes there for $2.80 each, Blue and Charcoal.  A steal for a good polish in my opinion.  The pictures on the website dont do these little guys justice.  I knew I would be in love with Blue the minute I saw it.  It has a subtle gold shimmer through it that doesn’t photograph well, but is gorgeous in person.

Im playing with ways to photograph my hands when they’ve been polished and my painting techniques, this hand position is too creepy claw for me.

This picture picks up the gold great, its really gorgeous.

I love this color.  Love Love Love.  It went on like a dream and it has had staying power.  Unfortunately, my mom got me a new polish today and it busted in the bag she had it in.  When I picked it out it got all over my pretty blue nails and I had to repolish.  Unfortunately again, when I took this pretty blue polish off, it turned my nails and fingers an ugly smurf blue.  While I love this color so much, I think it will only be used for special occasions and with a heavy duty base coat underneath.

In health and fitness news, Im down another pound and a half!  That brings my total to 21.6 pounds lost.  I put on my wedding dress tonight and it was too big.  I cant remember exactly, but I was at least 10 pounds heavier than I am right now on my wedding day.

I hate that it took going through a divorce to find the motivation to lose this weight, but I think that its really a testament to how depressed I was throughout my engagement and marriage.  Let me tell you people, when you know you’re doing something wrong, don’t do it!!  If you have any doubts about anything, be it a relationship, a purchase, a big decision, a small decision, anything, don’t do it.  Take it from me people, I really know.

Manic Monday

In 10 days I file the final divorce papers.  On March 30th I plan to be 5 pounds lighter than I am now.  Im not going to die if I dont make my goal, but Im going to try really hard.  I know this is a lofty goal, but it will be a big day and I want to wear my skinny jeans.  It really sucks walking into the same place that you got your marriage license at to file your divorce papers, I hoping my skinny jeans will make it a little easier.   In order to lose these 5 pounds, Im cutting some things.  Like my favorite pumpkin scone I get once or twice a week for breakfast, or drive through breakfast at all.  Im going to try to eat a salad a day, which is easy, since I love a good salad.  I eat perfectly while Im at work, its once I get off that I fall.  Its so easy to snack at home, or get some drive through, or whip up some cream cheese icing (lol!!).  So Im cutting snacks after work too, except one small one right after and then dinner.  Nothing is allowed after dinner.

I can do this.  It will be done.  If I wish it, it will happen, or some of that other mumbo jumbo.

Im also giving up on the gym.  I cant afford to join a new one and I just cant get my butt to UWF.  One thing I do love is walking with my pup and he loves that too.  So Im kicking the running/walking into high drive.  Tomorrow is a C25K day, so this week will alternate that with a long walk on the other days.  Im not going to post out the days, since its the same thing every other day, you get the drill.

The last thing Im going to do is post my intake again, but without any cheating.  I totally ate things that I didn’t log when I would post it before, no more lies.

So there you have it my readers.  Are you with me the next ten days?  You dont have to participate, but I would really like it if you would cheer me on. 😉

P.S.  If I reach this goal I will be below wedding day weight.  That will be amazing.

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